Saturday, March 1, 2014

Confession: We Got a Car

Confession to the Riding Phrius readers: We now own a car.  In fact we got it seven months ago.  It has been an identity adjustment, especially for this writer of Riding Phrius.  I have some explaining to do on how we got here.  With our car saga of the last few weeks, I have even more to share.  But first we need to catch you up on the decision to get a car.  Read on.

I got a call from Hillary over a year ago in November 2012.  She was breathing hard, biking the Roo to pick up one of the boys.  The tone of her voice mirrored the temperature outside, cold.  The message was crisp, "put on the list for 2013, get a car."  I took note, knowing it was just a matter of time before the kids' growing bodies and growing number of activities would push us to get a car.  But I also recognized the emotion of a tough moment. Yes, that day was a heavy dose of winter weather. But the rough winter conditions might ease up. Plus, Hillary's mom would be here for Christmas soon, giving us access to a rental car for two weeks.  But, I got two similar requests from Hillary over the next few weeks.  I started to reconcile myself with the idea that we might have to start looking for a car in 2013.  But as we headed into the new year, a Christmastime loaner car from friends and a break in the rough winter conditions paused the determined calls for a car.

Then we got a tempting offer a few months later in May.  Hillary's sister's family was moving back to Seattle from Washington, D.C. and did not want to take their 15 year old VW Passat Wagon with them.  It was actually the same car that punctuated our car-free decade while they were living in Copenhagen for one year in '04-'05.  It had 127,000 miles on it and was in pretty good shape.  It wouldn't make sense to pay to truck it, nor put the wear and tear on it by driving it to Seattle. They were ready to just buy a new car out in Seattle. And time was limited for selling it in D.C. So they offered it to us gratis.

Hillary immediately wanted to accept, but it took me many days to get on board. I thought of those beautiful mornings of biking the kids to school in the Roo.  Biking a trailer full of fall harvest fruits and vegetables home from the farmer's market.  Playing the games of tag with the kids while waiting for a bus connection. Enjoying reading together on the bus, and the unique perspectives on the city offered by public transit. Those moon-lit crisp nights biking back from a friend's house after dinner through freshly fallen snow. The kids asking, "are we going to take the bus or ride our bikes?", with cars never even on their radar.  Of course, just because we have a car wouldn't mean we couldn't experience those moments, right?  We know how special those moments are, even when sometimes suffering those really tough times when the bike was extra heavy with kids or the bus was missed. Surely after 10 years of experiencing them, we wouldn't stop seeking them out.  The problem is, having a car sitting right in front of your house makes using it way too convenient.  One's impulse to save 10 or 15 minutes on an errand often wins out. Rain or cold offer easy excuses to drive rather than bike. Then choosing the car over bike or bus becomes a habit. So, it was hard to think of letting go of our car free life. Ultimately, knowing it was just a matter of time before we needed a car and that this was a unique offer, we didn't pass it up.

Last June Hillary summed up so well what she's learned from our years without a car and announced our changing status.  She wrote this post on her Facebook page: "After 10 years without a car in the Twin Cities, here is what I've learned. You need to be stubborn. You need to be flexible. You need stamina, studded tires, and good winter and rain gear. Patience is important, and planning. I could use more of those last two. A garage full of bikes, a high frequency bus route, and a community of friends willing to give rides or loan you a car helps immensely. Even then, it's still not easy. You can't be afraid to ask for help, and should accept all offers. So when your sister offers you her car, for keeps, you don't say no. Come August, it looks like we'll be a car-light rather than a car-free family. Until then we will enjoy another summer of Riding Phrius, and then strive to keep the car parked as much as possible."